Lately I have been meditating on Psalm 62. God has me in a period of waiting and I have to tell you I am learning a lot about patience. My mind and heart are exhausted. My flesh is continually fighting my heart. I struggle to distinguish between what is His will for my life and what is my own foolish will. It has taken a long, hard road full of pain and trials to get me to the point I am at now a completely broken girl that is engulfed by love for her Savior. FOR GOD ALONE MY SOUL WAITS. My knees are shaky and I am stumbling forward as I walk towards my God. I will wait here for what He desires for me. I can be patient, I can have alone time with my Creator until He reveals what I need.
Psalm 62:5-8
5For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,
for my hope is from him.
6He only is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress; I shall not be shaken.
7On God rests my salvation and my glory;
my mighty rock, my refuge is God.
8Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart before him;
God is a refuge for us.
My dear friend and Pastor Kent gave his last sermon at NCC last night and this song pretty much sums up everything he said. The church has been trying to domesticate Jesus and we have failed. We can’t. His heart is with the downtrodden, the hurting, the lost, and that is where our heart should be too.
I repent, I repent of my pursuit of america’s dream
I repent, I repent of living like I deserve anything
Of my house, my fence, my kids, my wife
In our suburb where we’re safe and white
I am wrong and of these things I repent
I repent, I repent of parading my liberty
I repent. I repent of paying for what I get for free
For the way I believe that I am living right
By trading sins for others that are easier to hide
I am wrong and of these things I repent
I repent judging by a law that even I can’t keep
Of wearing righteousness like a disguise
Just to see through the planks in my own eyes
I repent, I repent of trading truth for false unity
I repent, I repent of confusing peace and idolatry
Of caring more of what they think than what I know of what we need
Of domesticating you until you look just like me
I am wrong and of these things I repent
